Pathways to self-discovery

  • Healing Trauma: Breaking the Silence Dear friend, I’ve been deeply immersed in trauma research, recently attending Europe’s largest trauma conference at Oxford University. In addition to counseling and working directly with clients and families, I am also a researcher. This week, I had the opportunity to present my research ideas at a multidisciplinary initiative at Uppsala University, focused on developing a Christian social teaching for Sweden. The setting brought together experts in ritual studies, ethics, psychology, and...Read more
  • How safety shapes who we become A large body of water surrounded by trees Dear Friend, Thank you for opening this letter. It means a lot to me. Last week, I had a conversation with a young teenager who shared how she didn’t feel safe at her mom’s house. Like many children of divorced parents, she splits her time between each parent’s home on a bi-weekly basis. As we talked, she told me about her experience, particularly how lonely she felt at her mom’s house. When they argued, which often happened, she sensed that her mom couldn’t let go of things. Her mom would...Read more
  • Pay attention to your attachment wounds man in black jacket and black pants standing in the middle of forest during daytime Dear Friend, I’m attending Europe’s largest conference on trauma, healing, and resilience this week at Oxford University. With thousands in attendance and some of the most prominent voices in the field—like Gabor Maté, Dan Siegel, and Bessel van der Kolk—it’s been an eye-opening experience. What stands out to me, again and again, is how deeply our childhood shapes us. Early experiences, even those we don’t consciously remember, leave lasting imprints on our mental well-being. It makes sense,...Read more
  • The Recipe for Life Isn’t in the Books—It’s in You Pathways to Self-Discovery #17 Dear Friend, Thank you for opening this letter—it means more than you might realize. Today, I want to share a confession: I have always loved books on psychology and human development. They offer me a sense of control, a belief that by understanding myself and others better, I can make life more manageable. They often come with actionable steps, promising that if I follow a particular recipe, everything will fall into place. But the more I work with clients, and...Read more
  • She was gasping for air Pathways to Self-Discovery #16 Enjoying the sunset in Nice, France. Dear Friend, I want to thank you for opening this letter—it means more than you know. I understand that life can sometimes feel overwhelming, filled with moments of uncertainty and fear. As someone who has guided many through their most challenging times, I know how crucial it is to take that first step toward healing and growth. Let me share a story with you, one that might resonate with where you are right now. Recently, I...Read more
  • The Unconscious and Consciousness - Pathways to Self-Discovery #15 Pathways to Self-Discovery #15 Enjoying the sunset in Nice, France. Dear friend, I'm still in vacation mode with my family. My two girls are off from school until mid-August. I love this time together with the family. We take each day as it comes, sometimes with no plans on what to do, and let the spontaneity of the moment invite us into play and rest. Summer has always been the season of change for me. I remember so clearly two years ago as I was sitting on my front porch with my journal and...Read more
  • Vastness, Awe and the Nervous System - Pathways to Self-Discovery #14 Pathways to Self-Discovery #14 Mountains in Chur, Switzerland Dear friend, June was hectic. I finished teaching the Rewire Summit together with my partner in crime. It took us almost 6 months to build the 4-day course. It's been an intense period. I likened this entire enterprise to building a prototype, launching and testing it and then building and reproducing at scale. We're in the latter stage now and I'm excited to be able to share what we did with a wider audience in the near future....Read more
  • I ran my slowest marathon ever and that's okay - Pathways to Self-Discovery #13 Pathways to Self-Discovery #13 This is an image from the Lochness Marathon 2019. I still remember the pain in my legs:). Hi friend, Thank you for opening my letter. It means a lot to me. On June 1st, I ran my fourth-ever marathon. It was the slowest marathon I've ever run. Not by much, by a couple of minutes. Do you know what? It's okay. I'm happy with my time. I can go into many reasons why I didn't run as fast as I had anticipated, the unusual heat being the main one (also, there were...Read more
  • Discovering your patterns to break free - Pathways to Self-Discovery #12 Pathways to Self-Discovery #12 Hi friend, Thank you for opening my letter. It means a lot to me. Tuesday was a rough day for me. I was overwhelmed by all the things I needed to get done in a short period of time. The combination of scarcity of time and the amount of work kicked my entire system into a freeze state. I hold space for others to explore their deepest fears and to show their darkest shadows. Holding space in and of itself can be healing, but it can also be overwhelming. Holding...Read more
  • Getting out of a rut - Pathways to Self-Discovery #11 Pathways to Self-Discovery #11 Hi friend, Thank you for opening my letter. It means a lot to me. We all get stuck in ruts. It's part of life and inevitable. But what is a rut? As humans, we need order and predictability. Order and predictability create a sense of safety. To feel safe, children need routines and predictable patterns. They need a secure base from where to explore the world. This base shows them that the world around them is not dangerous and that if there's any danger, they can...Read more

Become a Self-Actualizer

Insights from Maslow and Ephrem I’m a big lover of the humanistic psychologist Abraham Maslow.  I’m a big lover of him because of his belief about

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